3 weeks plus.. Meh.

So it's been over 3 weeks now since we lost our little angel Hope. I'm starting to live with what I call the new normal. I'm starting to feel like myself again but a different version of me. I feel like a part of me is missing which makes it hard. I'm able to laugh and smile again without faking it.

There is not one minute of the day where I don't miss her but I know she is safe. So all I can really do is heal and become stronger. Each night which I know might be silly to some I talk to her. It's a special time at night where I cry or smile thinking about her.

I'm doing my best to just carry on. I try to keep focusing on the fact that Andrew and I will keep trying to become parents to a healthy child. The scary part is not knowing if we will get pregnant again or if we do will me miscarry again?

Just trying to rely on God right now. One day I hope things will be okay. Until then please let things calm down for the time being I have had enough and truly can't take much more.

For my Husband