August

So it's been a few weeks since I have last written. Mostly because there is nothing new to report. So my parents do foster care so my mom need to buy clothes for an 18 month old. Well it was my first  experience in the baby clothing section of Wal Mart that I didn't want to cry the whole time. Other times I've seen baby clothes and literally walked the other way as quick as I could.

So what I've learned is that I think I'm finally truly starting to be okay with our loss.. I miss my angel, but I'm thankful it's getting easier. Life does go on even if you feel it should stop. I'll be 28 on August 20th and I do keep thinking about how nice it would have been to still be pregnant for my birthday. I know we are starting all over again.

So it's August which does mean Andrew and I are trying to conceive again. I still having a few mixed emotions about it.. I will say I really want to be able to get pregnant again. I'll keep my fingers crossed that it doesn't take another 5 years to get pregnant. Praying for our rainbow baby.

I'm truly hoping that since I was able to get pregnant that we will get pregnant quicker this time. I know deep down I really just want to be pregnant before Christmas. Christmas for me has been hard since we have been married. I see all these families buying gifts for their children and doing festivity  things which I long for. Also our due date for Hope was a few days after Christmas.

Anyways I'm just living my life spending time with family and hanging out with my best friend Amanda. I'll be going to a John Mayer concert on August 17th which is my birthday present so I'm excited. I hope everyone is enjoying their summer!!!!

**~Baby Dust~**